Kitty for Sale

This is what happens when parents allow their three year old to choose a present for their paediatrician:

You get an expensive silk shirt with a fluro yellow cat on a fluro pink background.

I am in Prison

The doors of the jail cell came clanging shut as my mug shot was being spat out by the printer on a plastic name tag.

It's official. Angelina doesn't want to adopt me because I am UGLY. :/ (I mean come on, what more does she want? I'm from an Asian country. I should not be discriminated for the fact that it is a first world country, and that I went to a private school and had piano and ballet lessons. Although my age is no longer a single digit, I am still able to fit into age 12 girls' clothing and weigh less than most of the 10 year old kids I see.)

I am stuck in a world where girls are going steady with the guy they have dated since they were 14. They're the kind that buy houses with their conventional (and obviously) heterosexual partners of the (opposite) gender and are waiting to be proposed to. They are gagging to have their surnames changed and for the opportunity to be called "missus". They look like the respectable girl-next-door; the kind a guy would want to take home to meet their mum. They talk about going to Bunnings with their partners on the weekend and I am REALLY going to have to kill myself now.


MUST

GET


out. i feel stuck :/