It's a Case of Arrested Development

It's no secret that I don't want children. Being realistic with my possible "career change" and desire not to be some billion miles away from the city, stuck in the 'burbs with three screaming kids complete with hair curlers in my hair, having children is just not a realistic option. I don't earn enough to support the lifestyle I want AND have kids. Plus, with everybody ignoring the elephant in the room when it comes to global warming, (ie: our earth is going to shit because we humans are over-populating a planet that cannot continue to sustain our exponentially growing population), somebody has to step in and make the ultimate sacrifice. Hopefully one day this sacrifice will be counted as a valid tax deduction. I think people should be taxed more if they have more children - it's additional carbon footprint, after all. I'm also annoyed with the fact that my tax payer's money is being used to support people who are financially incapable of independently providing for their children. Why should I be the one paying for somebody else's stupidity and inability to manage themselves? Having children is a privilege, not an entitlement. But then, that's another story......

So where does that leave me? Over the past month, I've started to become more acutely aware that I'm about to lose a whole bevy of friends in the next few years to coupling and children..... Mothers with babies tend to all of a sudden inherit a whole new group of friends (ie: more mothers and babies,) and if you're not a part of that club, you tend to end up being left out in the cold, so to speak. I'm sure there are exceptions to the rule, but I think this rings true for the majority. It's not that I'm blaming anyone or saying that it's intentional. Children are all consuming, and unless you're extremely extremely important and your friend makes a conscious effort, friendships don't really stand a chance.

Being unattached becomes a social problem as you grow older. It's the dilemma of every smug couple - trying to fit in a single person into their dinner party. It's awkward to have an odd number so the single person inevitably ends up being paired with whatever loser the smug couple so happens to find. (Omg, Bridget Jones was right.) A good friend recently told me of his narrow dinner party escape - couples with children plus one couple trying (to have children). He panicked and made up a lame excuse not to go at the very last minute, narrowly escaping an evening of baby talk complete with couple (who had no kids) breaking down and crying, because they were the only ones who didn't have kids. God help us all.

I use to be critical of guys in their early thirties hanging out with people in their early twenties. "Shouldn't they be hanging out with people their own age?" were my thoughts. Now I've come to realise that it's a classic case of arrested development. Friends of their age had probably moved own with coupling and children, leaving them no choice but to hang out with younger people who have not reached that stage.

Maybe I should try and join the bandwagon. Being coupled up will be the minimum, but then the issue is trying to find someone. Many girls have told me, "Nobody is perfect," but then, I'm not after perfection. The problem is trying to find that intense connection and attraction. There's also an expectation of intimacy somewhere down the line. Not sure how people do it, or whether they just compromise. Will keep you posted.